I promised to do this every episode. I am regretting that promise but anyways here we go -
1. Larho Mujhey – Bilal Khan
They say having a nice face removes most of your other faults. I don’t know who they are and I just made that up 30 seconds ago but that line can be applied to Bilal Khan. Listening to Bilal Khan gave me a brain aneurysm. The song which you will probably see in an urdu dubbed Disney film was designed for his fan base (mostly 14-21 year old hormonal girls (and in some cases some guys too)) who pay more attention to his face than his voice coupled with the fact he was dressed like he just showed up at his Barat the song was meh. Also let’s not forget his weird urdu pronunciations (dont worry Bilal mine are worse, but I usually ended up getting abused for them instead of getting compliments) which remind you of those Chinese videos you see on youtube where the guy or girl sing a hindi song and people leave comments like “Thank you for taking an interest in our culture” even though they’ve just butchered “our culture”.
2. Ishq Aap Bhe Awalla – Chakwal Studio and Meesha Shafi
Sidenote – I really liked this but I’m a music analyst and critic hence I need to give an opinion on everything
This was the best song in the episode (imo) but the thing is if you were to find Chakwal Studio or anyone like them at a wedding or at a gathering (or even on the roads in some cases as you do) most of these Coke Studio fanboys who are praising it would never appreciate it and in 90 percent of them go like “Ewww look at these paindos pata ni kiya ga rahien hai. 20 rs ka note hai inhein pakra dou” and also please spare me the whole ”Well Coke Studio brought them into the mainstream and to the public” bs. Also what is the point of Meesha Shafi? Why was she even in this song? Or why does she have to be in these type of songs to make them hip and relevant etc. Like a friend pointed out to me no one even liked Arif Lohar before but as soon as they added her into his song he’s awesome all of a sudden.
3. Pere Pavandi Saan, Mithu Tahir
Coke Studio have run out of ways to fuse music together so they decided to auto-tune a Folk Singer. Awesome guys, meet Mithu “Lil Wayne” Tahir. Great job Rohail Hyaat you genius you. Also mujhay Sindhi ni aati.
4. Rabba Sacheya - Atif Aslam
Atif decided to show up in a neck brace this time around. I don’t know why and I don’t think I want to know why he was wearing that…thing. (As the start has showed I didn’t really listen to more than 5 seconds of the song.)
5. Khabaram Raseeda - Fareed Ayaz and Abu Muhammad
Feel sorry for the two fat kids clapping their hands at the back of the stage in this song. You just know they’re like “Yaar kidhar phass gaye hai mein tou muft zarday kay chakar mein aiya tha idhar.)
Later, Uzair Jaswal I’m patiently waiting for you.